I’m still hopeful that one day my dream 11 years in the making will come true. That I will have access to this man. And I will ask him for a hug. And he will say yes. I wish in that hug that will undoubtedly only last about two seconds I was able to tell him how I feel, how all of his fans feel. How much we love him and support him and just want him at the end of the day to be okay, to be happy, to be at peace with himself.
I’ve been sleeping better since I started working out. I hope other things change for the better and soon. It’ll be hard to be patient. I know sore muscles today is a good thing.
Sometimes I wish I didn’t look on petfinder.org. Especially at kill shelters. I want this dog.
"And when it all goes to hell, will you be able to tell me sorry with a straight face?"
I don’t care what people say, I don’t care how childish and lame he acts sometimes. Pete Wentz is an amazing lyricist. Fall Out Boy will always be in my top 5.
My cat is cute. I mean, really cute.
This is my long week. National ALS Conference from Tuesday through Saturday. Super long hours. Just gotta remember it’s all overtime hours earned to get my day and a half off in April to see my family (and Criss Angel!) in Vegas.
Why do I even try to have a savings account?
My bank account hasn’t been this low.. ever. I have about 400 dollars to my name, minus the 600 I have in savings. I want to keep all of the lights off and drive nowhere. I am really stressed to the point of trembling and desperately needing to cry. My mom is going to call later and all I will want to do is talk about this but I have to keep it from her because I have no fucking idea where all of my money went. I’m supposed to use $500 to get my brakes fixed but somehow even though they wrote me a $500 check, I don’t even HAVE that much in my account anymore. I may have to ask them for MORE money and I really can’t stand this. I don’t really want to miss BSF again tomorrow but I don’t feel like doing the huge lesson from this week nor do I feel like being social. Not sure if you’re really allowed to miss two in a row though.
Aside from Paisley doing wonderfully and being the greatest little kitty I could ever ask for… I hate my life. I really do.
I probably won’t go see Greg Proops tonight at the Improv. It’s just $3 down the drain and I really don’t have the motivation to get in my car and burn the gas. I just feel like laying on my futon and watching movies. That’s what I do when I’m depressed. It never makes me feel better, but being alone is the only way. It’s just the only way.
This is slightly creepy. A BSB FAN REUNION?? I can’t imagine the kind of people that will show up at this. I mean I love BSB and all, but.. I’ve been to their concerts. I’ve seen the 23 year old girls in homemade tshirts with 500 pictures from BOP magazine of the Boys. I’d rather keep my distance.
I need to be productive today. But again, my body just doesn’t want to do anything on weekends. I don’t blame it. Hopefully I can get my laundry and my BSF done at least.